Oak Trees and Grass

In our Wednesday night class, we have been studying the book Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby (and others). This past week's chapter had to do with how to handle God's assignments for you. Actually it dealt with how to handle it when the assignment you believe God has given you isn't going right. He talked about how it shouldn't frustrate you if things don't seem to go well. He suggested that you confirm your assignment and make sure you didn't take over and do it your way instead of waiting on God.

In fact, a large portion of it was about just that -- waiting on God.
Doing things God's way.
Knowing that His timing is right and perfect.

Hmm. Sound familiar to anyone. It hit me pretty much in the face -- both when I read it and then when we discussed it again last night. That's what this last part of the adoption has been. Waiting on God. And waiting some more.

I know that my friends and family probably don't realize it but the adoption is constantly on my mind. I think about it daily and, I would even venture to say, hourly throughout the day. Everything that I talk about or experience goes through that filter along with the other filters of my life and personality. Most people who ask about it are kind of like, "Hey whatever happened with that adoption?" or "anything new with the adoption?" I don't mind those questions at all and I'm glad people ask them. But I know what it is to live moment to moment with it either in the corner of or the forefront of my mind. I've come to understand what it is like to have something like that going on and to be in wait. I've come to a new empathy for people who are in wait.

So, to hear a discussion about it was just an affirmation that we are "in wait" and there's a reason. His example was that grass grows quickly and dies quickly but an oak tree takes time to grow and mature. You have to wait for it. I know there's a reason for this wait.

In four days, we will celebrate (?) our third LID anniversary. That's 3 years plus 3 months of dossier compilation plus a few months deciding to do it. And I suppose you could even count the two years before that when we first researched it and then waited for God to tell us to go with it. This has been a part of our lives for a long time. And yet we continue to wait.

Already on this journey I have matured and grown. But I guess I'm still growing. And I'm thankful that God is in the business of growing oaks. If there is a child at the end this or not, I will have become a stronger and sturdier child of His. I know He's preparing me for eternity. And my trust is in Him.