Breakthrough

Today we met Emily. We thought we had met her on Gotcha Day but she is apparently one of the children who shut down. Today in the hotel room (her safe zone) she let loose. Before now, she had interacted only minimally with us, only used one or two words, still wouldn't use her cup or spoon (like she apparently knows how to), wanted to be carried, and did nothing but smile a little and look around. She is still pretty much that way in public. In fact, we had talked about whether or not she might have something like Downs or be autistic. She was that much zoned out.

But suddenly today, she was there -- that kid we read about in the descriptions and saw pictures of. She was laughing and playing. She knows so many Chinese words, we will need to expand our vocabulary too a little. We even got a few "sheh sheh's" from her when we handed her something she asked for. That's how you say thank you although it's spelled with an xie or something. She played and acted like any 3 year old I know at home. I even got offered some kisses. When music played, she swayed to dance (we were sitting on the bed) or 'played piano' as Hubby put it moving her hands and arms like she was leading an orchestra. If not for having to feed her dinner, we wouldn't have left the room the rest of that day for fear of breaking the spell. It was amazing! If I had shown any of our group the video we made for a little of it, they would think I had dragged some kid out of the hall and dressed her in Emily's clothes. She is two seperate people in my mind now -- Tong tong in public and Emily in private.

Of course, as soon as we had to go out for dinner, the walls came right back up. But once we got back and got her bath, they crumbled right back down and she showed us her personality. A sweet, private gift for us alone. The room is her safe zone. Now we need to let her learn that we are her safe zone and not the environment. But if we got a glimpse on the second day, I imagine it won't take too long. Public is not something she's been in a lot I would think anyway so it's completely new. They told us that the children rarely go out even with a foster family so I know it's just new and a little scary. We are both feeling much better though.

Now if we could conquer the sleep thing. I really think that's just more of the same fears but we'll see. I had to give her a toy last night to get her to stop crying and kicking. Actually wailing is a better word. If patience is a virture, we will learn it in China and be REALLY virtuous by the time we get back. :)